Monday, April 2, 2012

A Tale of Horror and Woe...
Or a Practical Joke

When I was sixteen years old, I moved in with my aunt and cousin. Unfortunately, they had only two bedrooms. My cousin, MJ, was seven years old, so not the ideal roommate. Only one possible space remained...a large hallway room, which was perfect except for a small detail. It had only three walls. Needless to say, I found myself often wishing for a fourth wall. I never did get that wall, before inevitably moving out, but I did wind up with several fun stories. And for this belated April Fools Day, I think it best to go with a story about Auntie N playing a practical joke on my poor unsuspecting - and completely petrified - best friend, Lynn.
Allow me to set the stage. Saturday night, girls' night. Auntie N is out on a date. Cousin MJ is staying over at a friend's house. Lynn and I are preparing for an evening of movie mania. My pick: horror movie classic, The Exorcist. Lynn's pick: Disney classic, Beauty and the Beast*.
*As a rule, Lynn only watched horror movies, if it could be followed up with a Disney flick.

Around 1am, Lynn is properly rocking back and forth on the couch, arms folded around her knees, and singing "Be Our Guest" to herself. I'm sprawled on the same sofa wishing I hadn't indulged in a fourth brownie and thinking about how I could make it to the bathroom without having to look in any mirrors*.
*See my mirror phobia post and that will make sense.

Auntie N returns home to find Lynn and I still awake. We tell her about the movies and our girls' night. She can't believe I got Lynn to watch The Exorcist and asks, "Isn't that the one where the girl spits pea soup?" My teenage self excitedly replies, "Oh yeah. That's the one." Lynn nods, but doesn't say too much about the movie. Auntie N gives us some of the details of her date, feigns exhaustion and ushers us off to bed. Lynn goes to the bathroom first to ready herself for bed, while Auntie N and I conspire in a most awesome plan.
 
Lynn is supposed to be sleeping in MJ's bed - he is at a friend's house - but since she is too scared after the film, Auntie N agrees to let her sleep in the large bed with her. The beginning of the end for poor Lynn. Auntie N says that she'll go lay in bed and I'm to await her signal. I happily agree and go to my own bed - in the hall. After Lynn finishes in the bathroom, she goes to my Auntie N's room and drifts off to sleep. The house goes quiet, very quiet. I hear the signal and peak around the door into Auntie N's room.
Auntie N is convulsing on the bed and shouting, "Lynn! Lynn!" Lynn comes flying out of the room, down the hall, into the living room, through the kitchen, back down the hall and leaps onto my bed. She's screaming in terror while I'm too struck by laughter to do much. Auntie N comes out of her room, hair askew, fingers like claws, and says, "Mother's in here with us, Lynn." 
After much cursing, shrieking, and eventually laughing by Lynn, Auntie N and I finally got to say, "Gotcha."

Not the kindest of jokes, but an instant classic. What's the best - or worst - practical joke you've ever played?

10 comments :

  1. Having this story told to me by all three of the participants at the same time was quiet entertaining :)

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  2. So cruel. How awesome. I'm not good at playing practical jokes. I feel too much guilt. I guess that makes me the perfect prankee. Thank goodness no one got me this year. Yet.

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    1. Oh yes. I played one on my brother when he was about four years old. For some reason he was afraid of the movie, The Mask with Jim Carey, and I decided to don a ski mask and jump out at him. He's nineteen now, and I STILL feel bad about that one.

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  3. Enjoyed that story, Tina. This sounds exactly like what my brothers used to do to us girls after watching movies like The Exorcist and Rosemary's Baby. :)

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  4. Oh my goodness, I think I would have had a heart attack!

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  5. Auntie N sounds like that fun aunt that all the kids idolize and hope they'll grow up to be like her! :) I've never been able to come up with any good practical jokes, but my middle daughter has the devious bent that makes her successful at it. On Sunday she conspired with the husband of a friend and another friend to "steal" the first friend's new car. They began by telling the friend that her car had a big scratch down the side, looked like it had been keyed. Once she was properly fired up, they all rushed out to the parking lot to examine it and the car was ... gone. All the jokesters played their parts to perfection (my daughter claims the husband deserves an Academy Award) and the joke went off without a hitch! I just hope they don't set their sights on me! :)

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    1. Oh that's brilliant! I like the way your daughter thinks. :)

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  6. The best joke I ever played was one I didn't even do, but I don't have to explain that, right now.

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